pride in writing..
So the past few days I’ve been trying to write a follow up on that last entry… looking at an symbology outline of Galatians I did back in december — trying to think of how to mesh good ideas, good words and everything together for another ‘inspiring’ post… and frankly… though my reading in Hebrews has continued to be inspiring… and God is giving me a lot more reminders again and again about fighting the good fight of faith — to take hold of my salvation and not let it go or be taken for granted…
Like just today –
*Hebrews 12:14-17 NKJV*
Pursue *peace* with all people, and *holiness*, *without which no one will see the Lord*: looking carefully lest anyone fall short of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up cause trouble, and by this many become defiled; lest there be any fornicator or profane person like Esau, who *for one morsel of food sold his birthright.* For you know that afterward, when he wanted to inherit the blessing, *he was rejected, for he found no place for repentance, though he sought it diligently with tears.*
Pursue peace (with all people) and Holiness — for the purpose of meeting with God…
And to *not* be like Esau who lost his birthright — trading it for a few bowls of stew…
The summer is dry and heated and well for many of us — myself included it sort of sways back and forth without much change, there isn’t really much ‘inspiring’ things happening and everything melds together… each day goes by and its so easy to succumb to lazyness, to idleness, and just go with whatever there is to do — tv, video games, writing — anything..
yet still the writer of Hebrews urges us to keep pursueing! don’t let a moment of tiredness, exhaustion, hunger, anything draw you away from your great salvation! Do *NOT* let anything, even in your moment of weakness, extreme business or lack luster fervency get in the way of your salvation — eternal life — to know God (John 17:3)… don’t let boredom, desire, busyness (work, school, ministry etc.) drive you away, but take heed to seek Him and know him –
Which brings us back to the point I started a few paragraphs back — something in reflection, that i need to learn is to be genuine in my writing — not letting what other people think sway my purpose — yes my passion is to edify people with my writing — but i do not write to inspire them, to inspire you — the purpose is to glorify God first, and utmost — that my life may be laid transparent unhindered that you might be edified in what God is teaching me — and doing in my life..
I’d like to repent of my pride, i’d like to repent of complaisancey (wanting to comply to expectations)… that though yes God blessed me with the ability to write that all inspiration, all life, all teaching comes from Him and Him alone — all Glory, Credit to Him… My reward, satisfaction from Him alone… “His Grace is Enough for Me”
It’s so easy to worship and serve in those areas that you are weak in because to depend on God is a must — you have nothing to fall back onto not yourself not others, just God–
And in strength — it seems all the more easier to fall back on yourself, your own skills, knowledge, philosophy– yet the spiritual reality of things is so very different — its in those areas that you are rich that you need God the most — because once pride, self sufficiency, or otherwise your own self trying kicks in — sure your heart can be to worship God… but you’ve already taken your salvation your faith that was given to you by grace — for granted… literally for granted. that you can go do your own thing — Yes you do have eternal life — that is in the literal For Granted! but the nature of that gift is continual…
*Matthew 19:24 NKJV*
And again I say to you, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God.”
Same principle — it so much harder for us to worship and know God through faith & dependence in those areas we are rich, those areas we are strong…
Oh God, beloved…
Come and take this pride me… teach me to be humble to love you with all my heart, all my mind, all my soul… That God you alone may be glorified not me, not my skills, not anything that I can do — but Lord pour forth that river of life in me– that you might move those barriers to my heart — and soften it from the hardness that comes from pride, self trying, mould me, breathe in me — that like a jar of clay i might be washed of dirt.. shaped by your hand and your breath (blowing glass), and doused into the Consuming Fire that you are… chasten me, discipline me — form me to glory, a reflection of your great love… take me and wash me, sanctifiy me that my writing might be worship to you — and a blessing to those who read it….
In you our most loving saviour..
Amen.