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*Romans 10:17 NKJV*
So then faith comes by hearing, and hearing by the word of God.

I want to share this once again found joy that wells up in the very depths of my heart today — after by His grace having the chance to meet up and share with Jesse and listen to him share again the simple gospel truths — of His Grace for me.. so simple, so deep, so profound; just letting His words speak life into the depths of me.. that faith — that mustard seed finally by the might and power of the Holy Spirit taking ground/root again — to live by Grace, through faith — nothing else - but the instilling of peace & joy — and the overflow of love..

if you haven’t read my last post, I was sharing about how as of late I’ve had this burden of heavy heartedness lately — normally ignoring it but when I’m truthful to myself to God — its there and just this welling of tears… not being able to do anything… but wonder & seek God..

and Jesse reminded me about the story of the Rich Young Ruler –

*Luke 18:18-23 NKJV*
Jesus Counsels the Rich Young Ruler
18 Now a certain ruler asked Him, saying, “Good Teacher, what shall I do to inherit eternal life?” 19 So Jesus said to him, “Why do you call Me good? No one is good but One, that is, God. 20 You know the commandments: ‘Do not commit adultery,’ ‘Do not murder,’ ‘Do not steal,’ ‘Do not bear false witness,’ ‘Honor your father and your mother.’” 21 And he said, “All these things I have kept from my youth.” 22 So when Jesus heard these things, He said to him, “You still lack one thing. Sell all that you have and distribute to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven; and come, follow Me.”
23 But when he heard this, he became very sorrowful, for he was very rich.

himself self righteous prideful — studying the law, clinging to it — coming to Jesus asking him *what must i do?* sort of like me — wonder what is it that i need to repent of — me wanting so much to *consolidate* my relationship with God — Jesus’ answers and meets the young man the same way he asks the question — like if you come with me by the law — I’ll answer you by the law — which is beyond what we can do — the rich young ruler couldn’t give up all the idols (things *he worked for*) of the world and follow Jesus — so Jesus left him the way he was..

Ironically a mere few verses later — there’s the story of Zacchaeus:

*Luke 19:1-10 NKJV*
1 Then Jesus entered and passed through Jericho. 2 Now behold, there was a man named Zacchaeus who was a chief tax collector, and he was rich. 3 And he sought to see who Jesus was, but could not because of the crowd, for he was of short stature. 4 So he ran ahead and climbed up into a sycamore tree to see Him, for He was going to pass that way. 5 And when Jesus came to the place, He looked up and saw him, and said to him, “Zacchaeus, make haste and come down, for today I must stay at your house.” 6 So he made haste and came down, and received Him joyfully. 7 But when they saw it, they all complained, saying, “He has gone to be a guest with a man who is a sinner.” 8 Then Zacchaeus stood and said to the Lord, “Look, Lord, I give half of my goods to the poor; and if I have taken anything from anyone by false accusation, I restore fourfold.” 9 And Jesus said to him, “Today salvation has come to this house, because he also is a son of Abraham; 10 for the Son of Man has come to seek and to save that which was lost.”

where Zacchaeus being a short social reject — has no ability to come to Jesus at all — and instead climbs up a tree just to see Jesus, not that he can do anything — but all he wants is to gaze upon Him; Jesus out of His mercy & grace goes to him — and says he (Zacchaeus) will dine with Him that very night) — and Zacchaeus out of the outflow of Jesus’ love for Him turns from his ways — *repentance by Grace!* and goes and *naturally* gives most everything away…

Two very contrasting images — both with an genuine sincere heart — but the rich young ruler — wanting to work for it — comes to Jesus with the law, Zacchaeus - socially rejected, sinful wants only to gaze upon His face — God’s grace coming not by what we can do

For me — this speaks to the very heart of the matter with me in my serving at CCF, my actions words and reflection on His beloved Church — my friends, my relationship with God — I’ve been going through Ephesians and ‘preaching’ His Grace each week — but that in itself I feel I’ve been trying to add my own bit to His Grace — and my trying to work for His grace to be revealed has not only separated me from that truth in knowing Him intimately — but has bore on my heart the heavy–impossible burden of sharing His grace..

mmm — thank you God, thank you Jesus, Holy Spirit !
to be in Him again, abiding in love –
seeking the Holy Spirit *First* — and letting reading & understanding His Scriptures come out of the outflow of that..
(not to say experience justifies scripture*)

just this indwelling of peace and joy that passes all understanding but comes only from the mouth, the touch, the breath of the Living God — intimate, real — O God Hallelujah Praise You O Lord !

*Love Again - Perry So*
tears of joy now rolling down my heart,
no long sorrow, no longer fearful,
but the natural flow of You:
to know You, to saturate in You; to love You;
with all my being, all my soul mind strength.
all of me — my whole heart.
for You, to be loved by You and in You.
Jesus - I am Yours again.